Chapter 60: Elle
Well, wouldn’t you be mad?
I mean, who carries a bleeding flask full of water, for Christ’s sake?
Anyroad, I stormed out of the shop, thinking desperately what I could do. Who dies from a blow to the back of the head, anyways? He was probably just in a coma, I kept telling myself.
I ran into Black's Books to see if Fran was there. And she was. Standing next to Manny. Who was standing in a box that had sign over it, which read, "Information Point."
"Fran!" I exclaimed, tripping and crashing around chairs and tables. "Fran! I need to borrow your car!" Fran and Manny looked at in between large swigs of wine, straight from the bottle. "What are you doing?"
"Bernard wants empty wine bottles to stick candles in," Manny explained.
"Can't you buy those?" I asked, momentarily forgetting about the crisis in my kitchen.
"What do need my car for?" Fran asked, slightly frowning.
"Long story," I replied. "Do you have jump cables?" I asked, having a stroke of genius suddenly hit me, but nothing registered on Fran's face.
"The ones that look like alligators?" I asked.
"Oh, yeah, yeah," Fran replied, nodding her head. "You're not going to be long - "
"No, no. Just...give keys," I answered huriedly, sticking my hand out expectantly. As soon as Fran had them out of her pocket, I swiped them in mid-air and ran back out of the shop to her car out front.
I not going to lie and say that I'm a good driver, because I'm not. And the amount of wine I had before hand probably wasn't helping. Let's just say there aren't any dustbins left in the back street that don't have dents in them.
I managed to get the car at least near our garden. I dragged the cables out of the boot, through our gate and in through the kitchen door, just in time to see Bert pounding numbers furiously on his mobile.
"Wot you doin'?" I asked, dragging the cables to our comatose friend on the floor. Bert looked up in surprise, fumbled with his mobile and drop it on the floor. He looked at me a swallowed soundly.
I glared at him before saying, "Give us a hand." Bert glanced between me, the Health Inspector and the shop door. "C'mon," I urged him, grabbing a hold of the man's legs, just above his ankles.
Bert managed to help me put him up on the kitchen table. He's not very strong. You would think he was from the looks of his "muscle tone," but Bert's really quite pathetic. Elise and I have carried men twice as heavy as that beanpole between us, and not had one problem.
After I had hooked the cables up to the car battery, I came back inside, getting ready to attach the other end of the cables to the Health Inspector's index fingers, when Elise appearred at the shop doorway, holding a duffle bag in each hand.
"Where're you off to?" I asked.
"Whadd'ya doin'?" she demaned.
You know, I'm sure if it worked for Dr. Frankenstein with lightning, it'll work the same for us. Just with more power.
